How to Escape the Trap of Rescuer and Victim Roles

Welcome to Adaptable | Behavior Explained! In this clip, I share a real moment with my granddaughter that made me realize how easy it is to slip into the rescuer role—doing things for others to avoid their discomfort, even when it’s not our responsibility. I also dive into the victim role—people who feel stuck, helpless, and constantly overwhelmed but don’t take steps to change their situation. You'll learn: What the rescuer and victim roles really look like How to reflect on your default role in conflict Why setting boundaries is key to breaking these patterns Practical tools like journaling and self-check-ins If you tend to over-function, feel responsible for everyone’s feelings, or constantly rescue others, this is for you. I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all.